Monday, December 30, 2013

December Hate Thing, Day 30....



I've been doing these hate things for almost an entire month.  It's been a lot of fun and I've covered a lot of things, I think.  Some of it serious, some fun, some of it was a combination of both.  This particular topic is one that I've been thinking about for some time.  In fact, I've been thinking about this one for a few years.

I hate that my kids are growing up.  I'm glad that they are experiencing things on their own now and are doing a lot to find their way and place in life, but what about the good old days?

 
 
See, I used to have these cute little sons running around in footy pajamas and now I've got these two other men walking around the house in their underwear....They shave now and steal my razors and shaving cream.  I used to have 2 little partners in crime who were ready to go with me and find out what kind of trouble we could brew up and now I got two dudes eating up all of my food that pretty much don't want to do anything with me anymore.  I used to have 2 little kids who couldn't get themselves dressed in the morning and now I have a couple of guys who steal my socks and shirts.  (Not all of my shirts are fair game.  Some are "old guy shit", so those seem to stick around my closet.)  I used to have a couple of kids that needed either their mother or me to get them to any extra-curricular activities and now I have 2 jokers who have their own cars, drive themselves everywhere and also have more tickets than I've ever had.  (I have no moving violations on my record....  neither one of them can say that.)

 

It's all different now.  I guess I knew things would change eventually.  On one hand, I'm glad I taught them enough that they can figure things out for themselves and do things on their own but I miss things like going camping or fishing.  It's been years since we went fishing.  The wife and I did manage to get them both to go camping this past summer!  It wasn't as hard as I thought it would be, but I am pretty sure both of them figured the camping as a "charity effort" just to keep their parents happy.

The wife and I had these two little guys who needed us for everything.  We had to cook for them, clean them up, get them dressed and comb their hair.  (Roger used to call lotion, "on you".  His logic was, "it goes on you".  Made sense.  He used to call ketchup, "french fry on you".  Wade secretly used to like it when I'd slick his hair back and call him "Fonzie".  He didn't even know who "The Fonz" was, but he thought that shit was cool.)  Now they don't do or say "cute shit" at all... ever!  To their credit, they often say some things that are absolutely hysterical.  That helps soften the blow that they are growing up.  But now, they really don't need us for a whole bunch.  Every once in a while they still need us for $20 bucks.  Nice to know that I still have a use when it comes to my kids.

I used to be able to convince them that they had relatives that they didn't have.  I told them of "Cousin Milka" who was a Swedish show girl who retired to Mazatlan Mexico to work in a topless bar.  When we went on a cruise down the "Mexican Rivera" they were semi-excited about meeting a relative they hadn't met yet....  I made up fictional characters like "Hargus".  I think I developed Hargus as some kind of deterrent so they wouldn't do stupid shit when they weren't near their parents.  I made up and they believed "The Night of the 29 Witches".  This was because they were both so excited for Halloween one year.  I can't remember the premise behind the "Night of the 29 Witches" but it was probably to make them think they could go trick-or-treating on two nights, or again as a device to keep them in check.  I guess if they end up psychopaths, I get to take responsibility for that.

Ah shit.... I hate that they are growing up.  As much as they drive my ass crazy, I am going to miss the shit out of them driving me crazy when they leave the nest and start lives and families of their own.  The wife and I are openly hoping for some grand children.  We don't want them this minute.... it can wait a few years, and we aren't holding our breath.  But the idea of having grand children that we can take fishing, hunting, camping and have over for sleep overs excites me!  The thought that we could have grandchildren over to spoil the shit out of, fill them full of sugar, buy them drum sets, tell them secrets about their parents, screw them up and send them home is a great thing to dream about.

Roger, Wade. Whether you read this or not, I love you both more than anything and wouldn't trade you for the world!  Thanks for being your mother and my kids. 


2 comments:

  1. I was missing the cute little boys my kids used to be until the toddler peed in my office last tax season. Can't wait to see what this year brings. ;)

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  2. You know Amber? I've been peed on, puked on and pooped on and I still love my kids. Don't get me wrong, they drive me crazy sometimes.... even then I love em!

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